Going Backwards
So I had some stuff to do for work. I decided to come into the office, knock it out, hop a bus and see the rents in time for easter.
Easter is a weird time for me. It’s sort of how like Chandler in that one episode of friends when he had a beef with thanksgiving.
My major events in no particular order are -
- My great grandmother was born on easter sunday. My family however didn’t get the exact date, so we just used easter to celebrate it.
- After being stuck in the Poconos for months, my parents, brother and I were going to see my uncle Joey and aunt Mella. My brother threw a temper tantrum for some reason, which triggered one in my dad, he decided to scrub the whole operation. Then grounded me because Steven could do no wrong.
- We didn’t even get out of the driveway
- A girlfriend broke up with me a few days before easter (if you must know, it was the one mentioned in the previous post). I went to my grandfather’s house that Sunday, when they asked about her where-a-bouts I told her she dumped me. They began to laugh. I told them no I’m serious and she really hurt my feelings.
- They laughed even harder.
- I get yelled at every year by my grandfather’s wife at easter. She wants me to take the chairs up and down from the basement, her sons are in-capable because one is a little too bi-polar, and other is too fem. It would be nice if she didn’t greet me with “get the chairs, and we spent your inheritance on getting bi-polar out of jail.”
- During the rough patch of 2005, I had to move in with the uncle on easter. I was yelled at for a solid few hours about the toilet seat being up, setting up my PC so I can find work, napping when everything was in place. Eventually I just phased out, and wondered what neighborhood Peter Parker is from?
So I’m a little weary of Easter.
I thought it was looking a little up because I had a bachelor party to attend last night. It was the first time in a long time I had a wild guy-centric night. I had a good time.
I arrive home, smokes are hidden, teeth are brushed, hair is clean (albeit long), fresh shaved, and gut sucked in. Because these are the major things my parents look for in my visits.
After kissing my mom hello, she smacks me upside the head.
“What the fuck was that for!”
Whap
“That last one is for cursing!”
“And the first one?”
“For smelling like overpriced beer, and cheap floozy!”
How does she know?!?!
