- Bomb Texas for freedom -

5/14/2008

Machines betray me.

File under... Day to Day — mylo @ 9:44 pm

So…

Faithe goes tits up.  But I have my 360 right?  I can play all the GTA, Bioshock, and Halo I can handle until I get a new laptop.

Right… right?

Wrong.  My 360s DVD is officially dead as well.  Of all the things that could have happened, the fucking DVD.  If it red ringed like a normal 360 I wouldn’t have to pay 100 bucks to get it fixed.

FUCK!



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5/11/2008

Something other than Faithe

File under... Day to Day — mylo @ 5:42 pm

I tend to avoid the apple store on prince street these days.  When it was first opened it was cool because it felt like an escape from what I did on a daily basis.  Now, it’s flooded with hipsters, artistic mommy’s, and tourists.

It makes me feel out of place.  I don’t really get why it became a tourist attraction, I thought of it as a compUSA with macs.  It used to be amusing, but as I’m there today an a upper middle class punk 12 year old is looking up random garbage as his mommy dearest takes pictures of him it just really makes me sick.

However I did manage to try out a few of the laptops.  I like the black macbook but my hands were cramping as I was trying out the mouse.  I suppose it’s because the apple store decided to go for form rather than ergonomics when designing the display tables.

I’m not loving it, but the idea of running Vista natively alongside OS X is a pretty powerful package.

If only I can figure out why I would really want to, besides better access to porn sites.



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No hope in Faithe

File under... Day to Day — mylo @ 2:00 pm

Or Faithe no more, or I have no Faithe.

Any of them will work, because this is a eulogy to a close friend.

My ever so beloved iBook G4. Who died last night around 10pm. I loved her more than any other woman I have ever hadShe wasn't as pretty but she was mine before, and possibly after.

I got her roughly four years ago, the relationship I had with my powerbook pismo was rapidly fading, c3i was going away, I was living in a basement in Staten Island, and life was tougher than it should have been.

However I needed Faithe, I used my tax return that year, and I bought her. I didn’t know what to name her, the pismo Vikki (short for Victoria) was easy to name because I imagined if she was a real person she would be a femme fatale with long red hair, a revealing black dress, and painted up like a porn star.

Faithe, oozed something else. It wasn’t danger, and I couldn’t describe it, but when I raised the question on what to name the new companion, it was SI Headcase that came up with it.

“Faithe.” She said.

I didn’t really think about it. It just fit. Her white casing promised hope like a bride on her wedding day. So, I dubbed her Faithe, and prayed that she would last longer than some of the relationships I had at that point.

Time passed and Faithe was with me when I applied to go to the New School. Faithe was the most protected piece of Cargo I had when I left Staten Island. She was what I was furiously typing on when I was pleading for a job to test video games. She was there for my more creative moments, and she was there when I really needed a friend.

A funny story was that when we were first acquired by the big MS, I was riding the elevator with the then CEO, and a MS exec. After all the time and effort CEO expended to get the deal to go through I was coming to work with a PS2 t-shirt.
He looks at the shirt and says “Wrong team mate!”

I looked back at him and the MS guy and say, “Yeah I also use a mac at home too, am I going to be shot as a traitor?”

They both laughed.

She was two then, in people years that’s the equivalent of 50. Retirement was coming around soon. Heart attacks, and senility were on their way.

Instead of that however, she backpacked across Ireland with me. In Inishboffin as we were cut off from the world, some how the old girl managed to find a wifi signal. Teresa the buxom pollack who worked at the hostel was delighted. Faithe for a few hours gave that girl a link to her home.

I think that was the last great miracle Faithe pulled off. When we got back from Ireland her power supply was starting to get wonky, her speakers were dimming, the USB ports were spotty. I was gentle with her, I understood. She gave her all, and we had been through so much together. I begged her for just a little longer, until I can find the funds.
She started slowing down, her hard drive was full of my life. And finally, the screen turned fuzzy, she locked up, and that was it. I knew it was over.

My old boss once told me, that I was definitely a tech at one point, because my belief that computers have souls. My evidence for that was Faithe.

Like all loved ones that you have to bury, the dying is the easy part. I have to perform an autopsy, transplant an organ or two, and then finally entomb her in the back of a closet for her eternal rest.

Good-bye Faithe, there will never ever be another one like you.



4/19/2008

I have a dream

File under... Day to Day — mylo @ 12:08 pm

That one day I’ll have a backyard, with a lawn.  Where I can dig a huge deep ditch.  Where I’ll crawl in, and return to the earth.

This dream started last night.  Ever since last year I had a strict “No hanging out for more than a beer with my coworkers” rule.  I loosened the restriction for a bachelor party, I then realized that maybe they aren’t so bad.  They were just different from the olde maverick startup days.

Ok I decided to break out completely, and hang out for a night out.  My old boss was there, and to be honest we haven’t been tight in a while.  She sort of fucked me over, and said one thing to my face then talked shit to a higher up.  Needless to say I’m not exactly fond of her.

We got re-orged and she moved on to a different role, not before she told me in her own subtle way that I suck after I re organized my life for a solid month to handle a crisis, and pulled us out of countless jams before that month, and a few after.

Anyway back to last night, she comes up to me bums a smoke and asks, “do you feel respected now?”

The night went downhill from there.



4/5/2008

Well maybe I am a teenage girl!

File under... Day to Day — mylo @ 6:39 pm

I’ve been sick which is good. It’s helping out my crash diet.

Fevers burn calories, hard work with the fevers sweat out the germs and fat. Only wish I knew what my target weight should be, doctors always neglect to mention what it is during check ups.

Why am I doing it? Well I have to be second best man at a friends wedding in February, which I so prefer than being the best man, but still I gotta look decent in a tux.

Then I realized that weight is going to be an important factor in Heart ‘o’ Darkness. Unlike cars moped’s have a much lower weight limit. So after doing some math, I figured I have to ditch some excess pounds, or the moped will have to do this solo.

Mopeds are stupid they don’t go far by themselves.

So I decided to kill calorie intake. So I’ve been eating one small meal a day. If I need more blood sugar, I have a coke or a coffee.

I try to incorporate more veggies on a regular basis, lightly stir fried. If I eat something that’s fried (i.e. dumplings from dumpling house) that’s it for the day, nothing else besides water. My stomach hasn’t been rebelling too much, so I think it doesn’t mind, and I don’t really need to be very active at work unless I go down for a smoke.

No it's not gay. Not at allUntil I get a junk bike for the morning commute, I’ve been running up the stairs all five flights. The good news is that I can get to the 5 1/2 floor without passing out. When I can get up to the 6th with no problem I’ll start adding weight to the run.

Questions?

  • Yes I am practically killing myself for someone’s entertainment by doing this. I am very aware of that.
  • No Jess doesn’t know, and you aren’t telling her, ’cause I’ll kill you. Besides I don’t think she reads this, so I’m completely safe. Unless you rat, then again you would probably die.
  • Yes I do know Che’s buddy in motorcycle diaries was a little paunchy and his bike had to carry two people with all of their stuff. But that was a full fledged motorcycle, I’m talking about a small motorbike that’s about 50cc to 70cc, it’s a way different ball game.
  • And they crashed a lot and the bike died half way through. I’m trying to avoid that.

Anything else? Good. Apocalypse Now people, apocalypse now….



4/3/2008

When Chachi attacks…

File under... Day to Day — mylo @ 2:00 am

Sexual assault is a laughing matter. And Buddy Lembeck likes it that way.

I may have thought it as an entertaining clip, for how fucked up it really is. Or I may have wanted to post bewbs.

I guess it’s one of those things, that will remained unanswered.

hee hee, bewbs.



3/30/2008

I’m lacking for a title

File under... Gaming, Geeky — mylo @ 1:36 am

So I’m broke, and I figured it would be a good idea to stay in for the night.

So I decided to break out the old gamecube. I bought it in January for 30 bucks, with a few games and they’ve all been collecting dust.

For the record I only knew 3 people with the gamecube One is a retard, the other somehow got hooked on Donkey Conga, the other was a girl with really low self esteem who used it to fuck nerds.

I turn it on, there is one thing I noticed with the last gen consoles, they all have creepy main menu’s. The xbox sounds possessed, the ps2 looks haunted; in the GC’s case it’s the sound. The damn thing sounds depressed. This would explain why emo’s love nintendo, however I’m broke, miserable, and my girlfriend is 3000 miles away, I don’t need a game system to push me over the edge.

I have a total of three games, Zelda, and Rogue Squad II, and III.

Starting off with Zelda, there’s not much to say. In fact I think for now on when there is a new Zelda game a reviewer can cut it down to three words “It’s fuckin’ Zelda”. One way or another I played all the major Zelda games on the home consoles.

They are literally all the same. The only thing that changes is the graphic engine. However the plot is the same, Link saves Zelda (except for Mask of Majora), Link meets Goron, Link runs through dungeon with the same puzzles as he always has.

You would think by now he would just keep the damn master sword, email Ganondorf on where to meet up fight to the death and call it a day. However nintendo barely acknowledges the internet, so I guess it would have to be by carrier pigeon.

Sadly this version seems to be a step down from ocarina of time. It’s the control and really the love of 3d link is gone. I was hoping for something new from this franchise with the latest game, but I was turned off as soon as I saw the Gorons in their orange blob glory.

The Rogue squads, their pretty much the same as each other. With the exception of 3rd person shooter sequence parts in III.

When it switches over to those parts, it can be described as excretable. They aren’t fun, they aren’t easy to control, and it doesn’t mesh at all with the series.

Otherwise the left thumb stick isn’t analog (so it seems). So it’s impossible to aim and steer really well. Otherwise, imagine this…

You’re a Rebel pilot, you’re being briefed. Admiral Ackbar walks in, and says “Men, we are outnumbered at least 20 to 1. The good news is tie fighters aren’t shielded so you just need one or two shots to take them down.”

The rebel pilots cheer.

“Oh btw, those shields don’t come cheap, neither does labor. We hired the best of the best from the best special ed school ever. Oh I forgot to mention, those tie fighters? They’re painted black, coincidentally so’s space. Clever right? First the death star, and now they figured out how to cloak their ships with a few cans of spray paint.

We got this really neat targeting computer so you can see them and shoot those fascist clones down. You aren’t allowed to use it. EVER. I don…

What Wedge?

Yes I know what I’m doing! Seriously, I’m a fuckin’ icon! What are you? Nuthin that’s right, yeah you have cool name, but I have a timeless catch phrase!

Sit down.”

My final assesment of the Gamecube, is a lot of my assesment of the Wii.

It sucks, and frankly if nintendo shriveled and died tomorrow I really don’t think it’ll be a big loss to the video game industry. It’s not like there are many 3rd parties that depend on them, and each gadget they make is just a skin deep veneer for the same game that’s at least a decade old.



3/25/2008

Don’t Hold Your Breath

File under... Heart 'o' Darkness — mylo @ 9:42 pm

I do have some news about Heart-o-darkness.

Ok breathe, in and out.  Yes, into the paper bag, it really does help.

I decided a little while ago to try and get some sort of sponsorship.  I figured if I pitch the story around at the same time I pitch it to a scooter and moped manufacturer, I might be lucky enough to get a nibble.

One nibble, leads to a bite, and a bite gets you a fish.

Tomos So I’ve been working on some pitch letters, and it’s one of those things that I really should have paid more attention with at school.

So far they’re pretty good.  They’re polite, honest, and I think funny at one part.

Jessica who has been incredibly supportive (as long as I promise to wear a helmet) pretty much thinks the whole project is crazy.

We discussed it today, and she basically thought at one point when I mentioned “support of my girlfriend and friends” that made me look daring instead of “lone madman”.

Of course that’s what I wanted to go for, I wanted the image of a prophet of doom riding the earth.

She says take it out then.

“But they’ll think I’m crazy.”

“Oh no, we wouldn’t want that dear.”

So, the most important letter is to the moped guys.  I pretty much have my real choice which is a Tomos LX, heavily modified for some more speed, carrying capacity, and looks.   Also with a new paint job, and get rid of those side fairings.

But all that being said I still need the moped.



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